My Miraculous Recovery


Yesterday I had surgery — inguinal hernia repair. The operation went well. I feel great today and am getting around fine with little to no pain. In fact, I feel so good, the biggest challenge of my recovery is going to be keeping myself from doing too much.

I had my pre-op appointment at the hospital Wednesday afternoon. They ran an EKG, updated my medical history, and told me what I needed to do the night and morning before the operation. The bottom line: nothing to eat or drink after midnight. No surprise there.

The surprise came when they said my procedure was scheduled for 10:30. WTF? I was expecting to have to be at the hospital by six or seven. Since we didn’t need to be there until nine, I called FMOE (Finest Man on Earth, aka my most recent ex) to let him know he didn’t need to spend the night. As we’d already planned to have dinner together, he came over and we grilled out steaks.

Five minutes before midnight, I scarfed down a bunch of ginger snaps (I think I’m addicted to molasses) and drank a glass of water. Jumping out of bed and going straight to the hospital works. Skipping breakfast isn’t a problem. Sitting around the house for a couple of hours with no coffee, however, was painful. In a world without coffee, I’d never leave my bed.

As usual, the nurse had trouble finding a vein for the IV and had to call in an expert. I’m always hard to stick, though I believe working out has helped. The expert stuck me twice, and after he found the vein, used most of a roll of tape to make sure it didn’t come loose. I cursed him and all his ancestors after the operation when they ripped the tape mass off my hairy arm.

I woke up in the recovery room feeling good. The nurse explained that the area around the incision would stay numb for a while and that I should take a Percocet as soon as I got home and every three or four hours afterward for the first day or two. No need to twist my arm. Fear of pain is a hell of a motivator.

FMOE dropped me off at the house and went to get the prescription filled. After sleeping most of the afternoon, I ate a dozen ginger snaps and sucked down most of a pot of coffee, followed by grilled chicken, yellow rice, and peas for dinner. Later I had a bowl of ice cream and more ginger snaps.

On a scale of one to ten, with ten being the worst, my pain level so far has never exceeded two or three. Except for the first few doses, I’ve been able to wait the full four hours to take the next one. Yeah, things would be different without the pain pills. Still, I’m amazed that I’m able to do so much so soon.

Which brings me to the point. Thanks to my miraculous recovery, overdoing things is a very real risk. The weather here in Athens has turned gorgeous. The ten-day forecast calls for sunny skies with highs approaching eighty degrees — perfect for running or working in the yard. Taking it easy is going to be a challenge.

But I must.

Though I won’t need the time to recover, I’m sticking with my plans to stay off work until the 25th to finish revising After Christmas Eve. I’m about halfway  through, and though there are challenges ahead, I feel like the worst is behind me. The week off gives me the time to work through the back half of the story.

I’m glad to be home, more glad to have the operation behind me, and grateful to FMOE for his TLC. Your thoughts and prayers made a difference, too. Thank you so much.

Michael


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