Category: Modern Gay Dating

Sep 12, 2013
By Michael Rupured

Masculine Enhancement

Listening to talk radio on long drives keeps me from falling asleep. Depending on traffic, a few minutes of Rush Limbaugh can keep me seething for a good fifty miles. Though his partisan rants are intended to amuse, the real entertainment comes from some of the ads — especially the ads for masculine enhancement. For the uninitiated, uninformed, or blissfully unaware, masculine enhancement is a radio-friendly euphemism for penis enlargement. That’s right, ladies (and both of the men who read my blog), your man can now buy pills, potions, devices, and exercise plans guaranteed to add inches to his… er, masculinity. Looking for a gift for the man who has everything?  Rare, indeed, is the guy who wouldn’t mind another inch …

Aug 26, 2013
By Michael Rupured

Back in the Groove

Events in the last half of 2012 changed my life forever. Losing my father, splitting up with my partner of twelve years, becoming a published author, picking up two new titles at the day job, moving to a smaller house and other changes disrupted my comfortable patterns and routines. I focused on the positive and, though I wasn’t always sure where the road would take me, kept moving forward. As a creature of habit, the collective changes to my daily rhythms stressed me out at least as much as any single event. With my system for keeping up with stuff in shambles, things fell through the canyon-sized cracks in my routines. So I’d make an adjustment, vow to do better …

Jun 13, 2013
By Michael Rupured

An Historical Perspective

Exploring the dating habits of contemporary gay men continues to require huge investments of time and energy. Data collection is ongoing. In fact, I see no end in sight. The larger the study population, the better the results. And as you know, I want only the best for my readers. Before we get to today, you need a better understanding of history. Specifically, mine — warts and all — up to my most recent ex. He doesn’t fit a mold I can only hope is now broken. In the months after I came out, 21-year-old me fell in love about 427 times. Bouncing in and out of the closet cost me the best of the bunch — a kind, handsome …

May 27, 2013
By Michael Rupured
Comments Off on Field Research: Unexpected Outcomes

Field Research: Unexpected Outcomes

I decided to write about my experience with the smartphone hookup apps to bring my readers up to speed on something I suspected they — you — knew little or nothing about. Most of you, including more than a few published authors of gay romance novels, are straight women. Reporting on my field research was a public service — an altruistic token of my appreciation for all the advice and support. That’s right. I spent hours and hours researching the subject — all for you — with no thought to any cost or benefit to yours truly. I didn’t expect to end up with a better idea of what I want (and don’t want) in my next husband and who …

May 23, 2013
By Michael Rupured
Comments Off on iDating: Results

iDating: Results

If you’ve been following posts about my field research on the dating habits of contemporary gay men, by now you should have a pretty good idea how the smartphone apps function. No doubt, you’re also curious about my experience. Have I met anyone? Good question. But the better question, given my current state of mind, is what do I want? The answer is… I don’t know. I’m open to possibilities, but currently have no interest in anything serious. This is uncharted territory and I’m trying to sort out what it means. For most of my life I’ve been a die-hard serial monogamist, rushing into relationships for all the wrong reasons. Like a gay Zsa Zsa Gabor or Elizabeth Taylor, I wanted …

May 20, 2013
By Michael Rupured
Comments Off on 3, 2, 1, Launch Profile

3, 2, 1, Launch Profile

When I created my profiles for the hook-up apps I’m using for my field research on modern gay dating practices, I opted for a generic face pic — one of several I’ve used here and on Facebook. Anyone who knows me will tell you, what you see is what you get with me. So I included my real age, height, weight, and that I lead an active lifestyle. Not to sound arrogant or anything, but I know at least some consider me to be handsome. My looks have opened a lot of doors over the years. Being attractive was never something I counted on, or until later in life, even believed to be true. But now that I’ve been working …

May 15, 2013
By Michael Rupured

Field Research: Meet the Apps

As promised, here’s the first of several reports on my field research about gay hook-up apps. As this research breaks new ground, my focus has been on in-depth personal interviews rather than surveys. Yeah. Serious stuff. My readers deserve the best I can bring to the project. I’m still in the data collection phase, but wanted to lay the groundwork with an introduction to the apps. There are tons of different hook up apps with new versions coming online every day for different subsets of the gay population. My research focuses on three — Grindr, Scruff, and GROWLr. GROWLr is for bears, cubs, otters, chasers, daddies, and chubs — over-sized and/or hairy men of any age and the men who prefer …

May 13, 2013
By Michael Rupured
Comments Off on Field Research: Could He Be … THE ONE?

Field Research: Could He Be … THE ONE?

Technology has changed dating — gay and straight — forever. Some of you may have used a computer to meet the love of your life, the second or third time around, anyway. But for most readers of this blog, any phone involved in meeting a love interest more likely involved a rotary dial than a touch screen. Before I plunge into a discussion about hook-up apps, here’s a little background to bring my long-married readers up to speed. No matter your sexual preference, meeting someone datable is tricky stuff. Back in the day, alcohol played a critical role. Waking up with a hangover next to the apparent man of my dreams, my first thought was more often,”What the hell was I thinking?” than …

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