Category: My Life

Sep 17, 2012
By Michael Rupured

More Change

I’ve been thinking quite a lot about how my life is going to change after my partner of the last twelve years moves out. First let me say that the two of us are getting along better than ever. The air has been cleared of any tension and resentments that may have built up over the years. There are no hard feelings and nobody is angry. We’re talking about our future plans and getting advice from each other just as we always have. The love, support, and encouragement from my many friends has made a difference. Your comments about my positive attitude help me stay committed to it. I have moments when I immerse myself in a life where “Falling …

Sep 15, 2012
By Michael Rupured

Restructuring

Coming out as a gay man in 1979 was a difficult, painful, and years-long process that I have no interest in repeating. My world turned upside down over night. I didn’t know how to act or what to do. Coming Out for Dummies hadn’t been written yet. A complete and total absence of positive role models didn’t make a rough transition any easier. So I made it up as I went along. On numerous occasions I wished for an older, more experienced gay man I could turn to for advice. Even one such person could have helped me to avoid making some of the decisions that I now recognize as reckless, foolish, or downright insane. Nearly twelve years ago, I …

Sep 09, 2012
By Michael Rupured

Seriously, Venting is Not Whining

The pace sure has picked up for me here in the last month. Seems like there just isn’t enough time for everything I need to do. Even after a week off from my day job, I’m feeling stressed. Don’t get me wrong–I’m not complaining. I’m grateful for each and every item on my over-full plate. But until I adjust to the additional weight, keeping the plate balanced so nothing falls off the side is going to be a challenge. As is often the case, it’s not so much one thing as the many. Again, I’m not complaining. My busy would still be a welcome and relaxing change of pace for any mother with children still at home. I’m fully aware …

Sep 07, 2012
By Michael Rupured

At the Family Compound

Vacations mean different things to different people. My favorite getaway is the beach. Relaxing by the water, getting too much sun, and eating seafood every day make for a nice change from normal routines. Nothing else comes close for me. My partner grew up vacationing in Panama City Beach. His grandmother lives there. Eventually, they added a second story apartment to her home, bought the place next door, and put a swimming pool between them with privacy fence on either end. I call it the family compound. Portions are owned by different people and have changed hands several times without ever leaving the family, the most recent being last year when my partner’s dad made the second building his permanent …

Sep 04, 2012
By Michael Rupured
Comments Off on Forever Changed

Forever Changed

What happened to August? Normally, August and January vie for the longest months of the year. Yeah, I know other months have the same number of days. But temperature extremes associated with the first and eighth months make them drag for me. Not this year. Cooler, wetter weather helped. It’s still plenty hot, but not oppressive. We haven’t had enough rain to bust the drought, but lawns and landscapes look better than usual for the season. Dad’s double-orange day lilies are thriving and I’ve only had to water them once. August 2012 was a milestone month and an emotional roller coaster. I buried my father and got an advance for my first novel. In between, I traveled across Georgia to …

Aug 30, 2012
By Michael Rupured
Comments Off on Loyalty Oath

Loyalty Oath

Not too long ago, I knew everyone who read my blog personally. Maybe we went to school together, or worked for the same employer, or did the same kind of work. The connection, whatever it is, was face-to-face and in real time at some point in the last fifty years. The number of visitors to my blog has gone up a lot over time. Some days I get more than 200 hits. But  I still feel like I know the majority of you in person. Even if we’ve never actually met, we’re friends on Facebook, or follow each other on Twitter, or read each others’ blogs or email each other. I know you too well to think of you as my …

Aug 20, 2012
By Michael Rupured

My New Normal

Too much has changed in the past month for my life to ever return to normal. I lost my father. But the end to his suffering and his inability to do the things he wanted to do prevent me from being sad. Mostly, I feel a profound sense of relief–like a huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders. The end turned out so much better than I ever would have expected, and for that I will always be grateful. Then I got the life-changing e-mail message from Dreamspinner Press. That was five days ago, and I’m still firmly anchored to Cloud Nine. My cheeks hurt from the giant and ever present grin on my face. I don’t think I’ve …

Aug 14, 2012
By Michael Rupured

Tales of a Slow Learner

Sometimes I’m a little slow. It’s more a matter of application than intelligence. Drawing me a picture helps…usually, but it can take a while. I still remember the day in high school health class when I suddenly got every dirty joke I’d ever heard. I laughed until my cheeks ached. I blame my sun sign–Pisces. The symbol is two fish chasing each others tails. It’s supposed to be a metaphor for our ability to see both sides of an issue to the point of indecision. We Pisces are also prone to dreaminess and have a tendency to live in our own world. Frankly, I’d stay there if the demands of the real world didn’t get in the way. It’s a …

Aug 09, 2012
By Michael Rupured

Stop the World!

Swapping the vacation my partner and I had been looking forward to for Dad’s funeral ended up being a good thing. We were already off work, and since we were driving anyway and had a free place to stay at the beach, changing our plans at the last minute didn’t cost anything. Any other time would have caused problems and posed challenges. All this to say I’m not unhappy that we gave up a relaxing week at the beach. Things have a way of working out for the best. Already exhausted from the previous weeks activities, I spent the weekend catching up on laundry, mowing, and other chores. My writers group met Saturday, and I managed to squeeze in a …

Aug 04, 2012
By Michael Rupured

My Dad’s Garden

I’m pretty sure gardening is genetic. Whether a recessive gene or one of those that lie dormant until needed, I don’t know and couldn’t say. But I know beyond a doubt that my love for gardening was passed down to me from my father’s side of the family. Dad’s mother kept a vegetable garden in the backyard of her little house on Park Avenue in downtown Lexington. She may have grown a few zinnias for cutting and maintained a beautiful collection of African Violets in her dining room. But Granny was first and foremost a vegetable gardener. Space was too precious in her little garden to waste on pretty things. Granny planted new crops in late winter, early summer, and late …

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