An Impatient Patient


A dear friend and mentor said recently that impatience is my number one challenge. Truer words have rarely been uttered. He was referring to something specific to writing. But his words have broader application in my life. No matter how you frame it, I’m not a very patient person.

What does patient mean? Merriam-Webster offers four pertinent definitions. Someone else might spend more time looking at other definitions. But in my desire to get this done, I didn’t. Hey, at least I looked up the word instead of winging my own definition. Let’s take a closer look at each of the four options.

Bearing pains or trials calmly or without complaint. Nope. Not me. Ask anyone whose had the pleasure of talking with me after I’ve spent a few minutes in phone-tree hell. Bearing pain isn’t really who I am, either. I hurt, dammit. Do something!

Manifesting forbearance under provocation or strain. Uh, not so much. I can go from zero to bitch in less than ten seconds. This is why I refuse to travel by air, drive in Atlanta, or shop at Walmart.

Not hasty or impetuous. Moi? Right. Fools rush in, right behind Michael Rupured. If I was going to be buried instead of cremated, I’d want “Hasty and Impetuous” on my tombstone.

Steadfast, despite opposition, difficulty, or adversity. Hmmm. Despite my epic fail on the previous three definitions, this one is somewhat true for me. Once I make up my mind about doing something, nothing stops me. Opposition, difficulty, and adversity may frustrate me, and I may change my mind, but I rarely give up.

But persistence isn’t patience. My biggest struggle right now –and to refer to it as a big struggle tells you how fortunate I really am — is my impatience to get back to my exercise routine. If it hurt to do stuff, I’d be less inclined to complain. But that it doesn’t hurt just makes me want to do more.

The doctor said thirty days. That means I’m halfway there, with two weeks to go before I can get back into my routine. I can wait. But at 3:00 p.m. on April 14, even if I don’t make it through the entire sixty minutes, the Zumba King of Athens returns!