Forced Procrastination


Procrastination has never been my thing. Waiting until the last minute freaks me out. Being on time or early is a lot less stressful.

I’ve been behind since a three-week bout with the flu last January. Losing Andy in March put me furher behind. Doing things at the last minute is my new normal.

Most evenings and the biggest part of my weekends for the past year have been devoted to work. Try as I might, I can’t seem to get caught up. Every time I get close, something else falls on my plate. A three-week break over the holidays was my time to catch up and work ahead.

That didn’t happen. For three glorious weeks, “I’ll work on it tomorrow” was my daily mantra. Screw regret. I’m on vacation, dammit. I returned to work further behind than I was before the break.

Several yearly conferences, numerous deadlines, and a host of meetings make January a busy month. Add teaching, and keeping up has been a challenge. Every spare minute has been devoted to meeting the next deadline.

Teaching is the cause for my new procrastination habit. Preparing two lecures a week leaves little time for anything else — especially the first time around. Before teaching a class, I had the flexibility to devote weeks at a time to a single project if necessary.

My endurance these days ain’t what it used to be. I can’t spend hours and hours on my computer anymore. Deadline or not, at some point I have to stop.

Teaching won’t always be so all-consuming. Once I get to the point where I changed things up last semester, I won’t have to spend as much time preparing lectures. I have fewer students too (27 vs 46 last semester) for a lot less grading.

My overwhelming workload is a temporary situation. Things will get easier soon. Or at least, that’s what I’m telling myself. I’ll keep you posted.

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