The Crotchety Old Man

Tag: gym memberships

  • My Three Gym Memberships

    I belong to three gyms. I joined the first in 2011 because membership was cheaper than paying by the class for Zumba. Aside from all the beef on display, the weight room didn’t interest me. I opted for a pricey membership that included regular sessions with a personal trainer. The guy who worked with me…

  • My Spare Tire

    Confession time. I’ve put on more than twenty pounds since this time last year. My belly is all jiggly and the man-boobs have returned. Pants and shorts without elastic in the waistband are uncomfortable. It’s not my fault. A penchant for sweets had nothing to do with it. My gym closed last May, tendinitis in…

  • My New Gym

    After the gym I’d used for six years closed in May, I joined a YWCO. Differences between the Y and my former gym were immediately apparent. I wrote about the most obvious on this here blog thingy back in November — 11/20/17 to be exact. If you’re on my web site, scroll down for that post…

  • Gym Memberships Revisited

    Six years ago, I joined a gym for the first time. A location close to my house and the availability of Zumba classes were deciding factors. Having never set foot in a gym, I sprung for regular training sessions to keep from hurting myself. The gym — Omni — hadn’t been open very long. Everything…

  • Renewing My Gym Membership

    A few weeks ago I renewed my gym membership again. The sales staff has been after me to re-up for months with phone calls and email messages offering “today only!” special deals. I fell for the “today only” thing the first time I renewed. Four years later, I know better. They’ve had the same specials since I joined.…

  • 90 Days My Ass

    Ads promise anyone can have a killer body in ninety days. All it takes is thirty minutes of exercise, three or four times a week. Results are guaranteed, or your money back. In the eloquent words of my father, may he rest in peace: horse shit. A perfect body has never been my goal. Not that I’d mind,…

  • Flying Solo

    When I joined the gym two years ago, I paid extra for weekly sessions with a trainer for two reasons. First, having not set foot in a gym since high school, I needed someone to show me what to do. Second, the extra cost kept me going. I’m way too cheap to let my pricey membership…

  • Call Me Transformed

    I joined the gym three years ago because it was cheaper than paying by the class for Zumba. My membership included weekly sessions with a personal trainer. He gave me a workout plan, expected me to follow it, and since he was really hot and more than a little intimidating, I tried to obey. In addition to two…

  • An Update on My Healthy Lifestyle

    Two years ago, because the monthly membership fee was cheaper than paying by the class for Zumba, I joined a gym. To make sure I didn’t pay for something I never used, I got the most expensive plan available. Having never set foot in a weight room in my life, I figured the weekly sessions…

  • My Personal Trainer

    Before last year, other than for Physical Education classes when I was in school or to watch an athletic event, I’d been in a gym exactly once. Hated it. Didn’t have the first clue what I was supposed to do, did too much, and after suffering for the next week, vowed I’d never set foot…