The Crotchety Old Man

Tag: Zumba

  • Dancing My Ass Off

    Best I can remember, weight was never an issue for me growing up. Mom served nutritionally balanced meals and didn’t keep much junk food around. I was active, too. After school, on weekends and during summer breaks, the kids in our neighborhood spent every waking moment outside climbing trees, riding bikes, and playing pickup games…

  • Addicted!

    Exercise has never really been my cup of tea. In the past, there may have been activities I enjoyed that happened to be good exercise. The dance floor at Johnny Angel’s kept me thin through my early twenties. Trust me, my interest in dancing had nothing to do with exercise. With each passing year, the…

  • The Longest Night

    Winter is my least favorite time of year. I hate cold weather, and the shorter days trigger my Seasonal Affective Disorder. Throw in all the holidays that revolve around food and a tendency to carb-load, and the biggest gift I get every year is an extra twenty pounds–or more–that I spend the next twelve months…

  • I Gotta New Attitude

    When I joined the gym last fall, I really didn’t think I’d stick with it. Nothing about my track record gave me reason to think otherwise. After a few weeks of sporadic and half-hearted use, any home exercise equipment I ever purchased went unused. I don’t know what made me think I’d go to the…

  • Success!

    In early 2011, I got within spitting distance of 250 pounds. That’s about sixty pounds more than I should weigh. My Body Mass Index fell solidly in the obese range.  To tell you the truth, I’d given up. For exercise, I rode my bike–weather permitting, which ended up being a pretty subjective decision. Too hot.…

  • Seriously, Venting is Not Whining

    The pace sure has picked up for me here in the last month. Seems like there just isn’t enough time for everything I need to do. Even after a week off from my day job, I’m feeling stressed. Don’t get me wrong–I’m not complaining. I’m grateful for each and every item on my over-full plate.…

  • Keep on Keeping On

    A bunch of age-related health issues hit me around my fiftieth birthday. My BMI (Body Mass Index) was well over 30 (obese), my activity level was zero, and the scale had drifted close to 250 pounds. Even my dress pants had elastic waistbands. Middle-age had caught up with me, taken up residence around my waist,…

  • And Somehow…Results

    Healthy Lifestyle and I are still having trouble getting along. I left the bitch in Georgia when Toodles and I went to Kentucky. There was just too much going on to be bothered with her. Since I’ve quit paying so much attention, my weight has steadily dropped about a pound a week. The ten pounds…

  • Ongoing Relationship Issues

    You haven’t read anything about my diet and exercise program since me and Healthy Lifestyle started feuding early last month. I said then that we wouldn’t be having this trouble if she just didn’t expect so much from me. Seriously. “Fine,” she said. “Do things your way. Remember how that worked for you? Remember where…

  • They’re Back

    The same ten pounds I’ve battled for the last twelve months have returned. Since we had to go out for anything we ate, I expected to maybe lose weight on vacation. I hear you laughing, but it’s happened before. Honest. After we got home, I stepped onto the scale–naked–so whatever number popped up would be…