Category: Advice

May 02, 2016
By Michael Rupured

Finding My Prince

I am a life-long serial monogamist. At the tender age of pushing sixty, I’m currently without my Mr. Right. This is the longest stretch (going on four years) without a significant other since grade school. Single life agrees with me more than I care to admit or thought possible. Still, I don’t see my bachelor lifestyle as a forever thing. One day he’ll come along… I’d like to meet a nice, gorgeous, and likable guy with a car, his own place, and full retirement benefits who takes good care of himself, thinks I’m amazing, and can’t keep his hands off of me. Is that too much to ask? Life is too short for bad relationships. I’ve reached the age where individual body parts have …

Jan 11, 2016
By Michael Rupured

Uncertainty

Nobody knows what the future holds. Anything could happen, if not tomorrow, then the day after. Or next week. Or maybe not at all. Uncertainty is inescapable. Making decisions would be easy if you knew ahead of time how things turn out. The future is a vast minefield of possibilities, likelihoods, and probabilities. Predicting what will happen with any accuracy is next to impossible. Some people handle uncertainty better than others. My mother spends a significant fraction of her time worrying about stuff that never comes to pass. After I called her on it, she clarified that when she says worrying about, she means thinking about. Same difference if you ask me. Faith doesn’t eliminate uncertainty, but it does offer an explanation.  Everything happens for a …

Oct 12, 2015
By Michael Rupured

Over the Hill

“Over the hill” is a term we’ve all heard, and on some level, come to fear. A quick search turned up the definition. Past the peak of one’s youthful freshness and vigor; far along in life; old. You talking to me? I continued my research. A few web sites said “over the hill” applies to anyone twenty years older than you are. Interesting, but a tad depressing. I wanted to find the definitive point at which one has indeed reached the apex. The Urban Dictionary says “over the hill” applies to people forty and over because they have reached the climax of their life time and it’s downhill from then on. Forty was so long ago, I can’t recall if I’d climaxed or …

Jul 20, 2015
By Michael Rupured

90 Days My Ass

Ads promise anyone can have a killer body in ninety days. All it takes is thirty minutes of exercise, three or four times a week. Results are guaranteed, or your money back. In the eloquent words of my father, may he rest in peace: horse shit. A perfect body has never been my goal. Not that I’d mind, of course, but I exercise for my health. Staying off medications is the goal. Any other results are just icing on the cake doughnuts I shouldn’t be eating. Nonetheless, I was sorely disappointed after joining the gym three years ago that three months of working out had produced so little change. Seriously. I almost quit. Eventually, getting to the gym became a priority for me. I’d like to workout …

May 25, 2015
By Michael Rupured

Where There’s a Will…

Do you have a will? A lot of people avoid estate planning — as if not talking about death will somehow keep it from happening. Wrong! Moreover, the worst thing you can do to your heirs is die without an estate plan. In recent posts I’ve mentioned my plans to retire in the next five to seven years. I’ll get a small pension from a previous employer plus Social Security. The bulk of my retirement income, however, will come from the money I’ve saved (including the match from my employer). At this stage of the game, the balance in my retirement accounts is significant.   God willing, my life force and my account balance will zero out at the same time. If I die before the …

Jan 19, 2015
By Michael Rupured

Pet Writing Peeves: Extra Verbs

The monthly “Pet Writing Peeves” I’d hoped to post all year ended last June. I ran out of things to bitch about. Who knew? I’d welcome guest posts on the topic. Previous posts in the category have largely revolved around things other writers do that annoy me. My goal was to share things nobody told  me (or more likely, I just missed along the way). I’m grateful to the writers who comprise the Athens Writers Workshop for finally telling (or reminding) me. I will always <3 them. The focus of this post changed half a dozen times. The connection between several similar issues wasn’t immediately apparent to me (#SlowLearner). I’m not sure my command of grammar is sufficient to explain the what …

Dec 29, 2014
By Michael Rupured

Swap Resolutions for Priorities

For most of my career, instead of days off for “lesser” federal holidays, my employer has given us the week off between Christmas and New Year’s Day. Depending on when the holidays fall, I usually add days of vacation time to either end — both if possible. Most years, the holiday vacation is my longest break from the day job. Being off for more than a day or two gives me a chance to catch up. In the early years, an overly ambitious to-do list for my holiday vacation meant ending the year feeling more defeated than renewed. Eventually, I figured out what I was doing to myself and scaled back my plans and expectations for the long holiday break. The journaling I’ve done since 1979 …

Oct 20, 2014
By Michael Rupured

Life After Fifty

My mother is the baby of eight, and my father was one of the later arrivals among ten children. Throw in the folks they married and the children the respective couples had together, and I grew up around an awful lot of people with widely varied views about what makes for a good life. All influenced me in one way or another, but none so much as Aunt Toodles. Long before she reached the half century mark herself, my beloved Aunt Toodles insisted life begins at fifty. That’s when she married for the first time — on Valentine’s Day no less — swapping a lengthy wild-child past for a self-proclaimed role as grand matriarch of the family. I love her more than ice cream and …

Sep 22, 2014
By Michael Rupured

Call Me Transformed

I joined the gym three years ago because it was cheaper than paying by the class for Zumba. My membership included weekly sessions with a personal trainer. He gave me a workout plan, expected me to follow it, and since he was really hot and more than a little intimidating, I tried to obey. In addition to two or three Zumba classes, my weekly exercise plan consisted of a thirty minute training session plus three more trips to the gym to workout on my own. I hated the weightlifting, but kept at it, knowing strength training would boost my metabolism. My prescribed workouts took thirty or forty minutes — tops — which I thought was an awful lot to of time at the gym. Ninety …

Aug 25, 2014
By Michael Rupured

Dancing My Ass Off

Best I can remember, weight was never an issue for me growing up. Mom served nutritionally balanced meals and didn’t keep much junk food around. I was active, too. After school, on weekends and during summer breaks, the kids in our neighborhood spent every waking moment outside climbing trees, riding bikes, and playing pickup games of various team sports. Getting a job when I was fourteen changed everything. With my own money and no financial responsibilities, junk food consumed the lion’s share of my meager income. My caloric intake shot through the roof, my activity level plummeted, and I got fat and sassy. Okay. Maybe I’ve always been sassy. <shrugs> The first time I lost a ton of weight was my senior year in high …

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